A healthy mindset for mediation is (1) an openness to negotiation and fairness, as well as a focus on problem-solving and resolution, all without letting your emotions and ego drive the process; and (2) viewing the process as neither positive or negative. Rather it's a chance to learn and grow as well as bring closure to your relationship - over the fixed thinking that you or your spouse failed in the marriage. Here are resources to help you both get into the mediation mindset.